Extraction - Day 13

It's a video game movie. Looks like you’re watching someone play Call of Duty Special Ops. Chris Hemsworth is a mercenary hired to rescue a kidnapped son of a Bengali drug lord. That’s it. That’s the whole story. That being said, Hemsworth is badass. I like him as an action hero, but more like the Keanu Reeves kind. When he doesn’t talk, he’s interesting. Action sequences are well staged and somewhat clever. It’s a good Netflix time waster.

The Girl in the Spider’s Web - Day 12

A sequel to the highly regarded The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo trilogy. It’s pretty bad. I loved those books and I also loved all of the film adaptations. This is stupefyingly inept. Their gigantic holes in the plot that shows main character Lisbeth Salander as more of a superhero than I troubled hacker. Here she is pitted against her long lost sister (how trite is that?) for control of software that hijacks defense satellites. Just dumb. Only watch this if you’ve never ever watched a decent film before.

Emperor of the North - Day 11

Hobos. Damn hobos! Ernest Bournine has to keep them off his train, even kill them if he has to. Lee Marvin is going to ride that train and get retribution on that hobo buster. Keith Carradine is his hobo protege. Marvin seriously says to him, “You could be a great bum.”

I didn’t expect to like a film about hobos as much as I did, but being directed by Robert Aldrich (The Dirty Dozen) its no surprise. There’s real tension working here. A really surprising find.

Dark Waters - Day 10

Mark Ruffalo stars in one of the best lawyer movies made in years. The title sounds like a cheap thriller, but make no mistake, this is a very serious film. It’s based on the true story of how the Dupont Chemical Corporation poisoned the water in West Virginia, causing unprecedented medical problems in humans and animals. The film reminds you why lawyers are important in this country and why corporations should not be allowed to run rampant over American citizens.

Ruffalo is believably passionate as the underdog fighting the system. You can tell he wants to remind audiences that he used to be a serious actor before he became The Hulk. This movie avoids too much melodrama, and the pacing isn't rushed nor boring. Just a solid flick

Timerider - Day 9

Fred Ward is the Timerider! I love Fred Ward. He was a constant presence in films throughout my lifetime. Bad movies like Timerider, Oscar winners like The Right Stuff. Action movies like Remo Williams. And Art movies like Henry & June. Most people know him from Tremors.

Timerider is about a motocross guy who  finds himself accidentally transported back in time to the cowboy era. There, people aren’t sure  what to make of him or his bike. A chase ensues and Ward must find his way back to the future. A very interesting ending here! I think the makers of this movie should be suing James Cameron. You’ll see why if you watch it.

The Assassination Bureau - Day 9

Nice British romp with Oliver Reed and Telly Sevalis, doing a terrible British accent. This has all the ingredients for a 1960s screwball action comedy: pre-WW1 setting, supervillains, cheeky protagonist and independent young women. This is precisely the kind of film the Austin Powers movies were trying to satirize. Reed is less wooden and more understated than usual. Film need more Telly Sevalis, he’s always good as the heavy. It’s an ok snapshot of what people were watching during the “Swinging London” years.

Cold Pursuit - Day 8

I started watching this, and in the first ten minutes I had deja vu. I knew I’d seen it, butI knew that hadn’t because it’s a recent film. Then it dawned on me that this is a remake of a Norwegian film I watched a few months ago called In Order of Disappearance. Now they’ve remade it into a Liam Neeson action title. The film is about a plow driver whose son is killed by a drug dealer. It looked like an accidental overdose but Neeson knows better and hunts down the killers. He even uses his snowplow to run down the men.

I know it’s a cliche, but the original was better, even though this is almost a shot-by-shot remake. When Liam Neeson is in the film, you know what he’s going to do. Still fun but not as charming. Watch it on HBO Go/Now.

Tales of the Grim Sleeper - Day 8

If you like documentaries about serial killers, this is frightening and political in many ways. This is about Lonny, a serial killer who terrorized  South Central Los Angles for decades. Directed by Nick Bloomfield, who has documented similar killers before, he investigates how and why this killer was able to operate for so long and very little was done to stop him. Fascinating and scary.

China Moon - Day 7

Ed Harris is a detective. Madeline Stowe is an estranged wife. He seduces her, but is he being played? Part of the 90s femme fatale trend. Like Basic Instinct and The Last Seduction, China Moon tries to keep you guessing. Unfortunately it's not quite the thriller those other two movies are. It seems a little quick and unsatisfying in the end, but hey, at least it was free on Amazon Prime and I made it all the way through it. Not a bad mid-morning yarn.

Harry Brown - Day 7

Available on Amazon Prime, Harry Brown stars Michael Caine in the title role. He lost his wife to cancer and his best friend to street punks. With nothing left to live for, Harry sets of on a vigilanate mission to clean up the London streets.

One of those Old Guys Kick Ass movies , like Death Wish. It’s a slow burn that really shines when it boils over. After it ended I really wanted more. Caine plays it cool the whole time, and never goes over-the-top. There are some weak attempts at social commerntary that try to cover up that this is indeed an exploitation film. And a good one at that.

The Human Factor - Day 6

There were a lot of aging Hollywood actors who  went to Italy to make films in the 60s and 70s. Quentin Tarantino captured this trend quite well in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. Here we have George Kennedy, heavier and balder, desperately trying to hold onto his. tough guy persona from his youth. He plays an American whose family is killed while they are working in Italy. Kennedy must find the killers and get revenge. It plays like a TV movie, but I’m s sucker for a good revenge film. I was glad to see another aging great actor slumming it here — Sir John Mills.

What Did You Do in the War, Daddy? - Day 6

Watch it on Amazon.

Terrible title for a good film. Directed by Blake Edwards (The Pink Panther) and written by William Peter Blatty (The Exorcist), this is a complicated farce taking place in Italy during WWII. The Americans capture a small Sicilian town, but they won’t surrender unless they can have a party first. Everyone gets drunk and suffers the next day. Things go wrong and eventually the Nazis take over the town and the Americans and the Italians must work together to get rid of the Germans.

James Coburn stars with some familiar faces of the time. I really liked this one. Blake’s knack for hijinks shines gag after gag. I plan on buying this someday.

The Long Riders - Day 5

What a cast! 

James Keach + Stacey Keach

Dennis Quaid + Randy Quaid

David Carradine, Keith Carradine and Robert Carradine

Christopher Guest + Nicholas Guest

All siblings playing siblings in this retelling of the James Gang and the Younger Gang. Director Walter Hill’s graphic western is a little more down and dirty than the traditional ones. Hill has made some great films over the years: The Warriors, 48 Hours and my personal favorite, Southern Comfort. I like the realism of the locations - this isn’t a back lot production. It is very violent and taudry. The story unfolds dramatically and the acting is exceptional but what the movie lacks is real tension. It’s a bit passionless, almost as if they couldn’t decide if these were good guys or bad guys, heroes or antiheroes.

After the Fox - Day 5

This was also on Amazon Prime and it’s an old Peter Sellars vehicle. Sellars plays a petty Italian thief who has a talent for breaking out of jail. He hears of a gold delivery happening on the beach in Cairo, and he decides to pose as a film director to pull off the heist. Dean Martin plays the hapless actor hired to legitimize the fake production.

Sellars was THE comedy genius of the 1960s, and this film is a good example of why. He carries this spotty script by playing multiple parts and hamming up his inner Italian. There is some satire of movie culture and political posturing, all in the name of fun. Sellars is often politically incorrect, by modern standards, in his film. I guess that’s one reason I enjoyed watching this. Remember when people were’nt so uptight?

Day 5 - Harry in Your Pocket

This was on Amazon Prime and it starred James Coburn so I figured I’d give it a try. Coburn plays Harry, a master pickpocket who is putting together a crew to make some serious money. He recruits a young couple who are down on their luck and begins instructing them on the art. Things go wrong, of course.

This film reminds me of the movies my parents watched on Saturday nights, before cable, when there was only one movie on so you watched because there were no other choices. 

I always enjoy a good crime caper. This is enjoyable. There’s nothing bad about the film but nothing exceptional either. Just a nice watch you can multitask to.

Sun Don’t Shine - Day 5

I found this on a list of great Amazon Prime movies to watch. It got better as it went on. A young couple on the road with a secret in their trunk. There’s jealousy and mistrust along with fighting. It’s a distracting little movie that deserves an audience.

Leave No Trace - Day 4

Truly a great film about a veteran sufferring from PTSD and living in a tent in the woods of Oregon with his daughter. When Child Protective Services tracks them down, harsh realities set in. This is an emotional and deep film that addresses some tough issues about family and veterans. The acting is suberb and the photography is lush, capturing the soggy beauty of Oregon. Highly recommended.

The Do-Over - Day 4

I watched about 10 minutes of this when it came out in 2016. I fell asleep then and never bothered to continue. Adam Sandler and David Spade fake their deaths and takeover new identities. It all goes wrong and Spade’s character learns to find his inner cool. I needed something light after sitting through an online faculty meeting today. There are some genuine good laughs in this. Spade has mastered his whimpy shriek and it cracked me up every time.  You gotta laugh at times like this.

Drunken Master - Day 4

I’m not a big Kung Fu fan as an adult -- as a kid I loved those movies, I'd watch them on local Philly TV on Saturday afternoons but eventually I lost interest over the years. I bought an “action” bundle of movies off iTunes a few months ago and this was included. It is a highly regarded Jackie Chan film so I decided to give it a try. I really enjoyed the scene where the teacher beats his students, I’m not sure why…

Chan plays Freddie, an incorrigible youth with no respect for his family or masters, but a strong since of right and wrong. His father hires the Drunken Master to improve his Kung Fu and give him discipline. It’s very comical, in a Three Stooges kind of way, as the master’s Kung Fu is only good when he’s drinking. He teaches his student the style of the 8 Drunken Gods and to respect his elders. The fight scenes are staged with precision

and the film never drags. Jackie Chan displays an athletic prowess that’s unbelievable.

The Flesh and the Fiends - Day 3

My favorite horror is British horror. This was an absolutlely brillant addition to the British canon, though it wasn’t produced by the famous Hammer Studio, it very much feels like it. Peter Cushing plays a doctor willing to pay for fresh corpses to experiment on. A very creeoy Donald Pleasance is just the man to supply them. Based on a true story of Burke and Hare, this Scottish chiller is one of the best. 

Death Warrant - Day 3

Jean Claude Van Damme’s ass is not in the right place. It’s halfway up his back! Just watch the opening scene if you don’t believe me. Van Damme is a cop who goes undercover in  prison. Robert Guilaume stars as the elder inmate. I get excited to see something like that. Guilaume starred in an 80s sit-com called Benson that my family watched every week. He had little need for a career when its run ended, but his presence in the film made me happy.

I was a snob when I was younger and would never stoop to watch a piece like this. But I’m older now and I can see the joy in watching trash. There’s gold hidden in this pile of rubbish, but admittedly, I must divulge that I fell asleep before the end. What a great sleep it was.

Bad Day at Black Rock - Day 3

Spencer Tracey is a mysterious stranger who shows up in a small Arizona town. The cowboys there are up to something no good and they aren’t sure if he is there to investigate them or not. They spend the whole film harassing him. The main reason I wanted to see it was because of Lee Marvin. I’m a huge fan.

This is the second film I’ve watched in 24 hours that features a one-armed man getting into a bar fight! How does that happen? Regardless, it’s an excellent movie worth checking out. Spencer Tracey made his character very believable, and the big surprise is a young Ernest Borgnine playing the bully.

Alice, Sweet Alice - Day 3

One of those movies that ended up on a lot of great horror film lists. It’s not great, but it is unsettling.  Atmosphere goes a long way. Is 12 year-old Alice killing her neighbors and family? Or is someone else committing these atrocities? The acting is over-the-top and it helps to make this a surreal experience to watch. If you want a little bit of Hitchcock with a little bit of John Carpenter, then this is for you.

A Dry White Season - Day 2

Growing up in the 80s, it was hard to wrap my head around the fact that there was a country in Africa where whites were subjugating blacks. It was an atrocity of violence and degradation. I never wanted to watch this film because I knew it would be a bummer; however, I also knew it to be a well-reviewed movie.

Donald Sutherland plays a teacher at a privileged South African school who’s gardener is arrested and killed while in custody. His outrage opens his eyes to the disparate situation of native Africans in his country. There is no justice and no peace. Really shows the dangers of blind nationalism and the inhumanity of groupthink.

The Guyver - Day 2

Back in day, we had to go to the video store to rent a movie. You’d roam the aisles looking for something interesting, but most of all you wanted something worth the money you’d spend. I must have looked at the box cover for this a dozen times and I knew it would be terrible but part of me always wanter to see it. I love bad movies. Truly awful ones. This has it all:  bad aliens, cheesy music, karate and Mark Hamill! A good bad movie must continually hold your attention and this one does. The ending is a bit tedious, as can be expected, but what a ride. Absolutely awful and I loved it.

The Fugitive Kind - Day 2

Marlon Brando, in a Tennessee Williams story, directed by Sidney Lumet. My ex-wife bought me the DVD 10 years ago and I never watched it. Now I had the chance. It’s an art film based on literature or like my  teacher, Professor Brady, once referred to Apocalypse Now as an attempt at art based on Art.

It’s not for everyone. An assorted bunch of the usual Tennessee Williams cast of misanthropes, vagabonds and drunks try to make their way working at a New Orleans dry goods store. Drama ensues.

The reason to watch is Brando, who is mesmerizing in every scene. He changed acting forever and here is a prime example of how he was ahead of his time in terms of naturalism. I notice how almost everyone else is “acting” and he is aloof and cool, delivering his lines as if he were living them. What a talent he was before he went insane.

Death of Dick Long - Day 2

Some hicks' partying leads to the mysterious and shocking death of a friend. They try desperately to cover it up, but some very unconventional detectives are on the case. The revelations they uncover are meant to be shocking but shock only has an effect if you care about the characters involved and there’s nothing interesting or empathetic about these people. The filmmakers are trying hard for that Coen brothers kind of tongue-in-cheek brutality that they achieved in Fargo and this comes close; but no cigar. I like weird movies. I like new ideas that challenge conventional modes of filmmaking. This isn’t it. I wanted to like it more than I did.

Lonely are the Brave - Day 2

This movie was on sale today for $4.99 and got great reviews so I bought it.  Kirk Douglas breaks into jail to bust his friend out. He’s a cowboy trapped in the modern world. Made by director  Sam Peckinpaw who was revered for his ultra-violent films. He made one called Straw Dogs that deeply disturbed me as a teenager - so I watched it dozens of times. In this one I love the scene where Douglas gets into a bar fight with a one-armed man. The movie then takes on kind of a Rambo vibe as the police search for Douglas after he breaks out. It really feels like First Blood completely ripped off this one - even down to the helicopter! Walter Matthau plays the sheriff on the hunt. Really poignant and tragic ending.

World’s Fastest Indian - Day 1

I can’t explain why I had a sudden urge to watch this Anthony Hopkins vehicle about a man who breaks the land-speed record in an antique motorcycle. I avoided watching this for many years. I wasn’t aware it was in Australia, whoops, I mean New Zealand. I like to see Anthony Hopkins playing a character instead of a personality. It’s kind of charming in its cliches. There’s like a reverse Dennis the Menace thing going on with the neighbor's kid that's endearing to a point.

I have questions though. When he gets to America, why does he befriend a transvestite? Why does she seem to fall in love with him? Not sure why everyone is so eager to help him. Why does the Native American put him up for the night? How does he seduce two women on his trip? I can't explain it. 

There’s a Forrest Gump kind of quality to the film -- a solitary journey of serendipities.

Not much adversity, just a series of small incidents along the way to the big event. Great appearance by a young Walton Goggins! If you would like to watch something lighthearted about historic moments in motorcycle history, featuring old people sex, this will do the trick.

Color Out of Space - Day 1

Just great to see director Richard Stanley back. Taking chances on an old H.P. Lovecraft story and offering us a unique film. Also good to see Nicholas Cage doing something seriously weird again. Reminds you that he was once a serious actor who took risks in great films like Vampire's Kiss and Wild at Heart. Much of Color out of Space works well. A nice rebirth for Stanley, who left the business after the Island of Doctor Moreau debacle (1996). Joely Richardson, whom I normally hate, does a great job balancing Cage and creating a sympathetic character while acting her way around the grotesqueness she becomes.  The film actually reminds me of Stuart Gordon’s work, with a little more aesthetic. Nice job casting Tommy Chong as the mystic hermit in the woods. Stanley builds the tension well and picks up the pace when it is needed. The visual effects avoid a lot of cheesiness (some was understandably unavoidable though). It is impressively trippy, in a David Lynch good way. You don’t see that style too often anymore. I hope Stanley continues making weird, challenging films.

Swimming With Sharks - Day 1

A movie I should have watched 20 years ago. I always thought Frank Whaley and I looked a lot alike at that age. This movie made Keven Spacey's career. It's about the abuse a movie executive's assistant is forced to endure. The assistant gets fed up and kidnaps his boss.

I wonder if David Spade watches this and experiences PTSD flashbacks? Spade was once held hostage by his assistant Skippy. 

It also stars Michelle Forbes from Kalifornia and 24 and Benicio Del Toro, young and very thin, shows up. I never heard of the director though. This the second movie Kevin Spacey gets kidnapped in. The first was The Ref with Denis Leary. This does seem a bit over-blown and over-conceived, but highly entertaining none the less. The love story is a bit unbelievable. I didn't buy it.  The lighting is very 80s. If you've ever hated your boss you'll like the torture scene. I have a feeling Kevin Spacey isn’t too far from this character in his real personality. Glad I finally saw it.

Ace in the Hole - Day 1

An old Billy Wilder movie he made after Sunset Boulevard. It's about media manipulating the news. This movie has no likable characters. I can see why it flopped. But the message is pretty clear and it's an entertaining watch. Kirk Douglas is good as the conniving journalist who perverts a newsworthy situation to further his own career, with tragic results. Kind of predictable ending though. Not sure the title really works. The tone and theme remind me of Paul Thomas Anderson's There Will Be Blood, which is a good thing.

Sunset Boulevard - Day 1

I never saw it before. I started reading Patton Oswald's book about movies and he starts it off with this Billy Wilder classic staring William Holden and Gloria Swanson. In order to read the book, I had to watch the movie. I always avoided it because I thought it would be a melodramatic chick flick. I couldn't have been more wrong. It's a gothic masterpiece about an aging silent film actress who entraps a young writer into her web of desperation and murder. Creepy, unsettling, and masterfully written. I can't believe they turned it into a cheesy musical.

Mission Statement

Why am I doing this?

I'm chiefly starting this blog to practice my typing skills. I've been using my quarantine time to finally learn this skill. I've always been embarrassed about my typing. I make so many mistakes that I've been nicknamed the "English Teacher Who Can't Spell". I spell very well but I have fat little sausage fingers and no typing training. Practice makes perfect and I need a lot of practice.
Plus I have ADD. Multitasking helps me focus. Just ask my girlfriend. I talk way too much during the movies we watch together, This way I can get my thoughts out without disturbing her.

Why a movie blog? 

Movies have always been my favorite pastime. I was grounded a lot as a boy so I became addicted to TV and books. They helped me escape into the world when I couldn't be in it. This statewide lockdown is bringing back those old feelings. Plus, now that I don't need to hunt and peck, I can watch and type without looking at the keyboard.

Who is this for?

Myself, of course, maybe I'll share it with my brother. Maybe my students, to show them some writing and provide an example.

The Rules?
I cannot watch any movie I've seen before. I am allowed to finish watching films I've previously started. Must pick offbeat movies - no blockbusters.